Rejoice and be glad

So I'm sitting at home today waiting for this big snow we are suppose to be getting. My mother-in-law arrived a day early (which explains why I didn't blog yesterday, I had to get ready) in order to beat the storm. So we are just sitting and waiting now hoping that it does snow, since she's from Florida and hasn't seen snow in years. As we sit and talk I'm reminded how quickly life moves and how we should make the most of every day. My mother-in-law, Melanie, works in home health and we've discussed how precious life is. It reminds me to enjoy each day. We were talking about quality time and I shared how that is part of the reason we don't watch TV much in our house. I don't want to sit and waste time while life passes me by.

We have a tendency so many times to want rain then complain when we get too much. To want snow then complain when it inconveniences us. To want sun then complain when it's too hot. To want a day or week to pass by quickly then complain later when life seems to fly by and our children grow up too fast. We (including me) need to enjoy each day whatever it may bring. Life does fly by too quickly and I don't want to spend mine complaining. So, if my children are fussing, the house is not picked up, the dishes are overflowing, it's raining and I can't send the kids outside or whatever, I will count it all joy. Because...

"This is the day which the Lord has made, we will rejoice and be glad in it." Psalm 118:24

Making time for your spouse.

So how do you have a large family and still have time for your spouse? You make time. Just like with reading your Bible, you will never find time to do it, you have to make time. It is so important to make time for each other. Remember how fun it was to go on dates before you were married? Well, go on dates after you're married too. Keep in mind that one day all the children will be grown and they will move on with their lives. You must work on your relationship with your spouse or when the kids are gone you will find you have nothing in common anymore. How sad would that be, to have shared so much with someone just to find out after the children are gone that you are living with a stranger.

Dates do not have to be extravagant or expensive. They can be as simple as going out for dessert if you don't have time for a whole meal. Go to a park and walk together. Go out to dinner when you can. I've known some to go grocery shopping then out for ice cream or something of that sort. Of course you can go all out and go to a concert or fancy restaurant, but if you set yourself up to do that every time you will find that you stop because you just can't afford to keep it up.

You should try to go out once a week. Have someone you trust watch the children so you don't have to worry about them. You need to enjoy yourself and not feel concerned about the care of your children while you are out. Remember to enjoy yourself, that is the point of the date. Talk, laugh, share with each other the things you haven't been able to share at home with the children around.

Another way to spend time with your spouse is to have a set bedtime for the children each night. This way you have some quality time together each night. Make sure you don't spend this time watching tv or on the computer or catching up on your reading. That defeats the "spending time together" part. Just because you're in the same room doesn't mean you are communicating with each other. Besides, without these distractions you'll find more opportunities for intimacy. Ever wonder why your not as intimate as you would like, think about what you spend your free time doing.

Make spending time with your spouse a priority. Too many marriages don't make it these days and I believe that is due in part to not making time for each other. I believe that if you can do this it can be the thing that could possibly save your marriage from being dull, mundane and boring. Make the time, you'll be glad you did.

Why we homeschool

Where I grew up everyone went to public school. I knew one girl that went to a private Christian school and had heard of one family that homeschooled. It was just an accepted fact that when you had children they would go to public school. I never really thought of doing anything different.

When I was in college my aunt decided to homeschool her daughter and had invited me to attend a homeschool meeting with her. It was at that time that I realized that I really wanted to homeschool when I had children of my own. After I was married and had children we attended a church where three other families homeschooled. My best friend, who had six children at the time, homeschooled and was able to show me how she did everything. We were surrounded by people that homeschooled. So, when it came time to school our oldest child my husband and I just naturally chose to homeschool (being in agreement was confirmation that it was the right decision for our family). So, since the very beginning I have homeschooled our children.

We choose to homeschool for various reasons. We believe that it is God's design for our family. We believe that our children will receive a better education through homeschooling. We believe that by homeschooling our children will receive the behavioral instruction we desire for them. We believe that it is our job to raise and teach our children and we choose not to give that job to someone else.

By saying all that I'm not saying that everyday is easy. And yes, there have been days when I wondered if it would just be easier to send them to a private school. But since I believe that God led us to this decision then He will give me the strength to do what needs to be done. I love watching my children learn and discover things. Missing out on this would be like missing their first step or their first word, for me anyway. It is a joy to hear my child read knowing that I helped them learn to do that. Just as I believe God enjoys watching us learn to do the things He is teaching us.

Many of you may wonder if you would be able to help your child learn by homeschooling, or think that you couldn't do it. Think for a moment who taught your child to walk, speak, drink from a cup, eat with a spoon, tie their shoe, etc. Now understand that there are all types of curriculum out there to help you teach however you want to teach; hands on, very involved, not so involved, through the computer, or textbooks. You can do it if you desire and there are so many resources available to help you achieve this goal.

I'm not saying that every person should homeschool. I believe that it is each person's decision to make on their own. But if it is something that you would like to do, then let me encourage you that you CAN. If you have the desire to homeschool then pray about it. God gives us the desires of our heart (meaning He is the author of your desire, He is the one giving you that desire). Yes, it's a little scary at first, but you can do it. Just take one day at a time, give it to God and remember to smile.

Why a large family?

I have answered some of the "how do you do it?" questions so now I thought I would share why we do it. We believe that children are a blessing from God and who are we to reject His blessings? It really was never anything my husband and I debated over or disagreed on, it just seemed to be something that God placed on both our hearts.

After we had Christiana there wasn't a question that we wanted another one so we didn't do anything to keep from getting pregnant we just let things happen naturally. After Josiah, we still wanted more so Kaitlyn came along, then Micah. After Micah, we thought that maybe we were done. Thinking that we had two girls and two boys we were satisfied. Then we unexpectedly got pregnant with Jonathan. After the shock wore off and he was born we felt so blessed to have him as part of our family. He is such a joy to all of us and so precious, I really would hate to think what we would have missed out on if we had decided to take our family size in our own hands instead of trusting God. Since Jonathan we have decided to trust God, since He knows best anyway. We now have seven children (Matthew and Joshua came after Jonathan) and we are open to whatever God chooses for us.

It is a step of faith to trust God in this area. So many times we want to think that we know better what we can or cannot handle, but God has shown us over and over again that if we trust Him to provide our family then He will provide for our family as well.

Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate. Psalm 127: 3-5

Helping Hands

I think it is so important to teach our children to help out around the house. One day they will have their own home and they will need to take care of it, so it is my responsibility to teach them. Keeping a home neat and clean does not just come naturally to everyone. To not teach them is doing them a disservice. I also think they should start learning as soon as possible. Now I'm not talking about being a slave driver. I do believe children should be children, but I don't believe that means all play and no work. Part of life is about fulfilling responsibilities, and we all have the responsibility of creating a happy home environment. The way to do that is to teach our children this responsibility as well. If everyone is doing their part, then no one person is having to do too much.

Now I have no problem with the children helping sweep, do dishes, clean bathrooms and such, the hard part for me is letting them help cook. You see, I LOVE to cook. That's my down time. I just enjoy cooking, it's not a burden for me. Of course, my children LOVE cooking too, so I'm having to learn to SHARE this job. It's the one thing I have to remind myself to have a meek and quiet spirit with. I can be in the kitchen fixing a meal and one of my precious children will come in and ask if they can help. Now I know I should be happy they are asking and gladly invite them over to help. Instead, I have to take a breath and make myself smile and invite them over. But, I do invite them over. I know that it is important for my children to learn to cook. It will help them with their budgets and to save a lot of money when they are adults. So, I CHOOSE to smile and CHOOSE to let the little ones come pour measured amounts of stuff in the bowls and stir and mix and pour, even though it takes longer. And I CHOOSE to enjoy this time and try to remember these cute little hands doing something that makes them feel BIG. I should be happy they want to spend time with me, so I CHOOSE to enjoy spending this time with them. One day when they are all grown up I'm sure these will be my fondest memories.

Picnic in January

Today we decided to enjoy the sunshine, after all the rain we have been getting. We couldn't have a picnic on the ground because it's soaked, so we had one on the front porch.

The sun was shining and the breeze felt great. It just does something to your spirit to get outside and breathe in the fresh air.

I am looking forward to this spring and summer so we can picnic more. We love picnics. They are cheap and you can take them anywhere. Just find a nice spot and set up. (Clean up is great too, no dishes).

Now we are all back inside getting ready to head to the store. I'm trying out some coupons today at Kroger. I'll let you know how it all turns out.

Family Time

It's not always easy to find time to spend with your kids. You have to make time. So many times we let modern conveniences take our precious time from us instead of giving us more time. How is it that it seems family quality was better back when we had less "conveniences?" I'm mainly speaking of the TV/computer. It's nice to have the world at your fingertips in a matter of seconds and to know what is going on through the news, but I wonder just how much we are truly giving up to have these. Besides, what is on there that is worth watching or more important than spending time with your children? Now don't get me wrong, I'm not judging anyone. I have been there too. It has only been in the last couple of years that we have cut back on the amount of TV that our family watches. Every day I make the choice to spend time with my family doing something like playing games or reading, instead of spending time watching TV with them (not really with them they just happen to be in the room while the TV is on). There is a BIG difference. Have you ever noticed that when everyone is playing together you don't mind the noise of little ones and they don't seem to get in the way as much. Yet, when you are watching TV you are always telling the little ones who are playing to be quiet and move (because they always seem to be in front of the TV). Ever think maybe they just want your attention? Ok, ok, I'll get off my soap box here because I think you get the picture.

Usually I'm the one who reads to the kids, but Jim decided he wanted to read a book to them that he read when he was young. The children LOVE this time with him reading. They always cheer when it's time to start and beg him to read "one more chapter, please." I love watching our children come together and cuddle during this time. It's a something I'm sure the children will always remember.

I challenge you that if you like to spend your evenings around the TV to take a break from it for a while and try reading to your children instead. I think you will find that it brings everyone together and brings some peace and quiet as well (you can't listen to a story while talking). Plus it gives everyone something in common that they can talk about and discuss. Or, pull out some board games and play together. It really is a lot of fun. And maybe you'll find that you enjoy it more than you thought you would. Our children grow up too fast as it is. Let's not waste any of the precious time we have been given with them. Make memories together.